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This blog is created by a Buddhist living in Singapore. He embraces the Mahayana spirit of Bodhicitta, deeply respecting all Buddhist Traditions as expressions of Kindness guiding us on the path towards human perfection ~ Buddhahood.

He likes to post stuff that he had read or think is good to share here, sometimes he adds a little comments here and there... just sometimes..

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“Sariputra, if there are people who have already made the vow, who now make the vow, or who are about to make the vow, ‘I desire to be born in Amitabha’s country,’ these people, whether born in the past, now being born, or to be born in the future, all will irreversibly attain to anuttarasamyaksambodhi. Therefore, Sariputra, all good men and good women, if they are among those who have faith, should make the vow, ‘I will be born in that country.’”

~ Amitabha Sutra

When I obtain the Buddhahood, any being of the boundless and inconceivable Buddha-worlds of the ten quarters whose body if be touched by the rays of my splendour should not make his body and mind gentle and peaceful, in such a state that he is far more sublime than the gods and men, then may I not attain the enlightenment.

~ Amitabha Buddha's Thirty-Third Vow

Thursday, October 05, 2006

Practising Presence for Partners of Intimate Relationship

This is a practice to be done with your spouse or partner in an intimate relationship.

There are so many people having problems in their relationships. Many fights and disagreements occur over minor or major issues. Many times it is the pain bodies (negative emotions such as anger, fear, anxiety, stress, depression, etc) within either or both parties trying to provoke a fight in order to sustain itself.

A scenario could be the woman having menstruation cycle coming, feels a lot of pain and unease. She vents her emotional discomfort on others, almost to the point of picking a fight. A similar scenario for a man is when he accumulated stress and frustrations from the workplace and returns home venting them the wife or girlfriend.

Although men are generally less emotional, their pain bodies can be dissolved by our attention and presence in the same way. The human touch is an effective form of comfort and it melts down defensive barriers that we put up to protect our vulnerable ego.

During an argument, it is useless talking to him/her with that kind of mental state. Simply apply the following method as follows.

If possible, it will be helpful to explain to your partner beforehand that this is what you will do to comfort him in the event of conflicts. It will even be better if both of you work together on this technique as a form of growth, intimate exchange and communication that transcends words.

If your partner is not co-operative, you can still do this yourself. However, it is only the moment when the mind is willing to let go, that the presence that is described here can be felt and has effect. When the mind is willing to let go and let be, that presence becomes a natural state. The deep sensation has the effect of healing.

Here are the steps:

1. Take a deep breath, and give her a hug.

2. With your whole body, feel her presence totally - feel her body warmth, the smell of her hair, and bring yourself to this moment with her. Nothing is more real than this moment - not the past, not the future. Devote all your attention to being present at this moment.

3. Then open your heart to her totally and feel with your whole body the energy flowing through her.

4. Feel the pain bodies within her with unconditional acceptance, giving attention to them and giving them space allowing them to be as they are. Maintain this and stop when she's comfortable.

~ UnAwakenOne
This is a nice contribution, I want to share my reflections and experiences too!


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