Encounters with the "mini-me"

Something had happened against my liking. As it happened, the 'mini me' in me started complaining,"this is not what I want, I want this, this and this... why don't you just do what i told you? why don't you understand, its so obvious!" The voice was furious, certainly dissatisfied with what had happened. Following this, strong emotions arose, my body tensed up, and I felt a pain underneath the anger that's on the surface.

This was me, my sense of 'self' resisting the reality of Now, wanting things to happen MY way. I feel my resistance to the reality felt like this: It is as if I'm pushing against a unmovable wall - but no matter how hard i push, I'm still unable to move it. Worse still, the harder I push against the wall, the more frustration, anger and tension builds up. This resistance of reality created a deep sense of negative energy, a pain, the suffering was intense.

When i've observed this, I let go of this resistance, putting my attention on this very moment, ignoring thoughts, stories, fears, emotions related to the past or future. Regardless of how strong or real these emotions are, this moment Now is what I focus, my top priority. I reminded myself, nothing is more important than here and now. Let go... let go... let it be... let it be...

In my mind, I stopped following the storyline of what happened. Aware of the emotions within me, I totally feel it as it is without judgement. Giving it space and allowing it to be.. Just aware of it, without any interpretation of from my mind, or response to it. Just let it be. I accepted things as they are... I surrender to the reality of Now, allowing it to unfold as it is. I gradually come to my senses - realising there's actually no need to push the wall. There is no wall. =)

As I do this, the negativity in me reduces its strength, a kind of release happens and my mind gradually calms down and feels at ease.

~ UnawakenOne

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This is a nice contribution, I want to share my reflections and experiences too!

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